older and wiser?

The all familiar phrase on birthday cards or well-wishes: "As you get older and wiser...". Is this phrase necessarily true? I am led to believe, due to a recent incident, that this phrase is over-rated.

And so the story begins...
In a recent event organised by the west wing of a certain hall, the Resident Fellows were asked to prepare a signature dish each for the supper that comes after games in the programme. All the Resident Fellows graciously agreed; however, due to the fact that Resident Fellow A's wife was out of the country, he offered to Fifi, the co-ordinator, that he would order the food instead of cooking it. Thus, Resident Fellow A and Fifi came to an agreement privately. To remind the Resident Fellows of the nearing event, Fifi decided to send out an electronic mail to all of them. In the electronic mail, she addressed Resident Fellow A separately from the rest, reminding him that he was to order the food and suggested that he used his Resident Fellow's fund to pay for it with the intention that he need not fork out his own money.

Almost immediately after sending out the electronic mail, Fifi received a harsh reply from Resident Fellow C (that he sent to all other Resident Fellows as well) saying that he was appalled by what she said in the electronic mail to Resident Fellow A. He said that she was being very rude and presumptuous to think that she could tell a Resident Fellow what to do and added on that Resident Fellows are of a higher 'social status' than 'residents like her'. There were other harsh remarks made about her and about how young people with no status are not supposed to talk to older people in such a way lest there would be consequences. Fifi felt that her intentions were misunderstood and that Resident Fellow C's assumption of what had happened was utterly warped. She also felt threatened and upset that he could send such an electronic mail to not only her, but the rest of the Resident Fellows as she felt that her reputation would be at stake (I do feel otherwise though, since Resident Fellow C's electronic mail was littered with grammatical errors and rather ridiculous theories of what is right and what is wrong). Fifi confided in her friends and found comfort in the fact that she did nothing to deserve his severe remarks.

This short story illustrates a scenario where communication goes wrong. There was a misunderstanding that sparked unnecessary unhappiness in people due to the over-assumption of one party. Besides the obvious miscommunication between the parties involved, there is another important aspect to consider; of which, brings me to my point: Does older necessarily mean wiser?

I believe that to a certain extent, getting older does mean getting wiser. With the inevitable entry of knowledge into the brain, and the experiences that one goes through each day that can only accumulate with time. However, I also hold firm that there is a threshold level for certain people. By threshold level, I mean a threshold age where people do get wiser up until a certain age. To me, anything above that threshold age would not translate as being wise anymore, but being narrow-minded. The all-knowing becomes the all-assuming, and this is exactly what happened in the story above. The fact that certain older people (older only by numbers) think that they are very much superior to younger people acts as a very eminent barrier to good communication which they claim is the infamous 'generation gap'. Of course, there are other older people who are truly wise, but this is definitely not the case for Resident Fellow C.

Without getting his facts right, he reprimanded Fifi and attempted to embarrass her in front of all the other Resident Fellows. Is this a right thing to do for a wise older person who has a 'higher social status' than 'residents like us'? Fifi was not given a chance to explain the real situation before her reputation was flushed down the drain by someone who claims that he is older, superior and wiser. Is over-assumption a characteristic of being wise? I do not think so.

Being brought up in a family with values like 'respect your elders'; I really do try to be the commendable young lady that my parents want me to be. However, when faced with people like Resident Fellow C, I really find it hard to summon that respect in me. Respect should be earned, and in this case, due to his utterly horrible communication skills, the only thing he earned is my despise.